A little boy opened
the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old
pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible,
and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from
a tree that had been pressed in between the pages. "Momma, look what
I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother
asked. With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered: "I think
it's Adam's suit!"
The preacher was
wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly
about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved
to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before
jerking it again. After several circles and jerks, a little girl in
the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he gets loose,
will he hurt us?"
Six-year-old Angie
and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in church.
Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had
enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." Why? Who's
going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church
and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."
The kindergarten
teacher was showing her class an encyclopedia page picturing several
national flags. She pointed to the American flag and asked, "What flag
is this?" The little girl called out, "That's the flag of our country."
"Very good," the teacher said. "And what is the name of our country?"
"Tis of thee," the girl said confidently.
After putting her
children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse
and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more
and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she threw a towel
around her head and stormed into their room, hollering, "GET TO BED
RIGHT NOW!" As she left the room, she heard her three-year-old say with
a trembling voice, "Who was that?"
The new neighbor
asked the little girl next door if she had any brothers and sisters.
She replied, "No, I'm the lonely child."
A mother was telling
her little girl what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside
on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our
front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I
sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
My grandson was
visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God
are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are
we alike?" "You're both old," he replied.
A little girl was
diligently pounding away on her father's word processor. She told him
she was writing a story. What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know,"
she replied. "I can't read."
I didn't know if
my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her.
I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell
me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I continued.
At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think you
should try to figure out some of these yourself!"
